While lying awake most of last night I had some thoughts about my time and how I spend it....
...but every time I see DD's room a mess, or the house, or DD not getting enough sleep, I feel guilty and feel as though I'm letting everyone down as a parent and partner.
Jen, this is something that I struggle with too. In fact, I think all mothers do, whether or not they work outside of the home, volunteer their time in various ways, or just have any other things in their life that take time away from their family.
It is really hard to juggle everything as a Mom, despite having the best intentions, and the greatest spousal support, it still is hard to over-come the "mommy guilt." When we do take some time out for ourselves, no matter how hard we try, some things do get pushed back, like cleaning that room, or putting that last load of laundry away...
But, I think we need to look at it like this: by investing time in our own selves, we are going to be happier, less stressed, and therefore, better mothers and wives... I also remember reading somewhere, that when kids grow up they do don't remember always having the cleanest house in the neighborhood, but they do remember whether their parents were "really there" or over-stressed with their minds racing about everything else that needs done.
If ballet makes you happy (and it sounds like it does) then you really need to keep doing that, for yourself. Maybe stepping back from some of your church committee work is not a bad idea if you are feeling a bit overwhelmed.
It is really hard, but I have had to learn to just say "No" when I am invited to yet another jewelry party, or asked to bake something for another bake sale, and to carefully state exactly what I am willing to do, and how much time I am willing to donate, when volunteering for things such as my son's teams, school events, etc.
Again, I think this is something all of us Mom's struggle with, so try not to let the guilt take the pleasure out of the things you enjoy.
