Ugh.  Does anyone actually look forward to confrontations and conflict?  Maybe attorneys...  anyway, I really hate it, and I'm finding it in my path more and more from my various roles and the leadership that comes with them.  It wears me out a little bit, and the anticipation of it upsets my stomach.  Anyone have any tried and true tips for dealing with conflict?  Particularly when it's breaking news to someone who isn't going to want to hear what you have to say?

I feel like conflict is a large part of my job on a day to day basis.  I've started to do a lot of my work from home/the field and avoid going into the office some days.  It helps.  Otherwise I tend to be right in the line of fire, and Negative Neds and Nellies can locate me more easily..........

I wish I had some advice on this, but I am really bad at this myself. I tend to bottle things up for way too long... Then, when the confrontation finally happens, I am so bent out of shape, that I have trouble communicating. Of course, afterwards I drive myself even crazier with all of the should-a, would-a's, could-a's... I can totally relate to how draining this can be.

The way to handle the conflict also has to do with the context - i.e. personal, work, kids... For me, handling conflict in things that deal with my kids (sports, school, issues w/ their friends) is the hardest. Next in line is dealing with conflict at work - because for me, being self employed, work is very personal. Too often, issues from work = sleepless nights...

I think Heather's advice on the "sandwich technique" is very good advice. Thank you Heather - I will have to remember that one!